05.14.08
Posted in Exercises, Musings at 3:16 am by Natasha Reilly
The other night I was at an open bar event. One of my favorite things to do at an event like that is listen to the names of the drinks folks order because people are more apt to be daring and get something they normally wouldn’t when they are not the ones picking up the tab. Fuzzy Navel, Sex on the Beach, a Dirty Girl Scout, the list went on. I started thinking, if I was a drink what type would I be and what would I be called?
Tashi Moxie would be my name and I would be similar to a mudslide, only better. Tashi Moxie would make you want to cartwheel around the bar.
What would you be?
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05.12.08
Posted in Exercises, Musings at 3:40 am by Natasha Reilly
Photo by Brian Moynihan
Sometimes, right in the middle of a project, we suddenly feel stuck. Our excitement and endless energy seem to have dissipated. Our ideas stop flowing and we wonder what to do next. Well, the best thing to do in that situation is take a mentalacation (Webster, I’ve got a new one for you! Mentalacation will be defined as a mental vacation for the creatively stressed out).
Think back to one of your favorite times in life. Close your eyes and pull up a mental picture of that place. Let yourself sink into the moment. Try to grab hold of the smells, sounds and feelings in that happy place. Stay there as long as you like and then when you open your eyes try to bring that calm, that happy energy to your work.
Right now, I’d like to be in Acadia National Park in Maine standing with my husband at this lake we found while hiking; it felt as though we’d discovered the lake hidden among the trees. The water was like glass; a perfect reflection of the sky. There was silence and beauty and a moose that followed us as we hiked down. It was like life – stumbling along a path with little direction in awe of the beauty, frightened and exhilarated at the sight of this enormous moose and sad when it all came to an end. In that moment by the lake, in the quiet stillness, there was peace.
Where is your happy place?
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05.09.08
Posted in Exercises, Musings at 3:20 am by Natasha Reilly
Recently, I attended a seminar where the instructor invited everyone to “introduce” themselves. I anticipated having to share what I do and where I’m from and then, either answer some ridiculous icebreaker question or participate in some crazy icebreaker exercise. As predicted, the question arrived but what I hadn’t expected was that the question would illicit responses, such as spork and the clapper, as well as reasons for those responses that would cause eruptions of laughter.
Now, I’d like to ask you. What do you wish you could “un-invent”? What is the one thing you wish had never been invented?
For me, it’s pantyhose. Putting on a pair of pantyhose is what I imagine it might be like to partake in professional wrestling.
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05.07.08
Posted in Exercises, Musings at 2:30 am by Natasha Reilly
Right now, I’d love some vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup, to have someone wash my hair (not that it’s dirty, I simply LOVE when you go get your haircut and the person massages your scalp) and then to be able to take a nap on the beach with warm sun on my skin and the sound of waves all around.
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05.05.08
Posted in Exercises, Musings at 4:28 am by Natasha Reilly
Photo: NASA, ESA, the Hubble Ocean Photo by Michael Van Woert
Heritage Team (STScI/AURA)- National Oceanic and Atmospheric
ESA/Hubble Collaboration and Administration
A. Evans (University of Virginia,
Charlottesville/NRAO/Stony Brook
University), K. Noll (STScI), and
J. Westphal (Caltech)
Last year, a giant squid was caught in the Ross Sea off Antarctica’s northern coast. Recently, marine scientists who are studying it found that it has the “largest animal eye on Earth”, “bigger than a dinner plate.” You can see a picture of the squid in the article on Yahoo News, “Giant Squid Has World’s Largest Eyes” by Associated Press writer Ray Lilley.
The Space Telescope Science Institute celebrated Hubble’s 18th anniversary by releasing incredible photos of colliding galaxies. You can see these awesome images when you visit the Wired Science article, “‘When Galaxies Collide’ – 59 New Hubble Images Released” by Loretta Hidalgo Whitesides.
These are two incredible discoveries. There is still so much more for us to find in the Universe. If given the opportunity – and you can only choose one - would you rather explore the vastness of space or the depths of the ocean? Would you rather be an astronaut or deep sea diver?
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05.02.08
Posted in Creative Stumbling Blocks, Exercises, Musings at 3:38 am by Natasha Reilly
My husband likes to call me, Bo, after one of the characters in M. Night Shyamalan’s movie, Signs. He has bestowed this nickname upon me as a result of the numerous, unfinished glasses of water I leave all over the house just as Bo did in the film.
Once upon a time, I worked for a newspaper where my co-workers were entertained by the unfinished Pepsi cans I would leave behind me. They would laugh as they followed can after can, with maybe a sip left, knowing that I would be at the end of that trail.
In the past, I was strictly a novel reading woman but lately, I’ve taken to reading essays and short stories. In fact, I’m currently in the middle of reading about three different books of essays. In doing so, I’ve broken my cardinal rule of reading one book all the way through to the end before beginning another one. What is all this?
I’ve come to the conclusion that I have a fear of finishing things due to my fear of failure which is equally as big as my fear of success. Time to call the Dr., this Mama’s got a big, ole bag o’ issues.
Don’t get me wrong there are things that I was happy to see come to an end like labor, root canal surgery and the last episode of Seinfeld. Despite my reluctance to see the things I enjoy come to an end, I do understand that most experiences have an expiration date so that new opportunities for growth can happen. I even get my fear of failure and believe most of you can relate. However, my fear of success has been quite puzzling.
For while, I believed that I did not deserve to be successful; that has changed. Now, I think the fear is born from a worry that when I get to the end of a project, it won’t turn out the way I wanted. Or, to take it to the next level, it will turn out exactly the way I wanted and I will realize that it was not what I wanted at all. Does this make sense to you? Do you ever feel this way?
Regardless of my feelings about success or failure, I know I absolutely have to continue moving forward with all the things I am working on. There have been times when I’ve let fear stop me from accomplishing my goals. I would freeze and my indecision would lead to the decision not to follow through on what I had started.
So, I am going to start to change my behavior. Today, I will finish what I am drinking before I pour a new glass or open a new bottle, especially if it’s alcohol. Hahahaha…I love entertaining myself!
In addition, I will color another section and write another line and keep going. Hopefully I’ll know the end when it approaches and when it does, I’ll cross the finish line.
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04.30.08
Posted in Exercises, Musings at 4:02 am by Natasha Reilly
My daughter makes this noise, a primal hum, when she is in that space between waking and sleeping. The sound soothes her and allows her to return to the peace of sleep. It reminds me of the moan Harry (Billy Crystal) made in When Harry Met Sally only more drawn-out and infinitely more hilarious.
Recently, I was feeling jammed up. My head was flooded with thoughts about work, creative projects, taking care of my daughter, familial issues, financial concerns, the need for a vacation, etc. I needed to quiet my mind but found that screaming, “Stop Thinking” in my head over and over was not the solution. Just then, I heard her on the baby monitor. She was curled up, eyes closed, humming herself back into a dream.
That moment was just the inspiration I was seeking; I just hadn’t realized it. I decided to lie upside down on my couch allowing my head to hang off the edge. With closed eyes, I exhaled letting a small sound slip from my lips. It was like a teeny, tiny growl. Gradually it built to a nice, respectable level which was just shy of being loud enough to wake her. My focus began to shift away from my hodgepodge of thoughts to my breath mixed with this growl. As the last bits of sound escaped, I felt an urge to laugh. I’m not even sure what struck me as funny. I felt light, free and utterly relaxed. Every part of me was filled with urges to color, write on the walls and dance around the room. Somehow this little, inner rumble brought me back to my playful self.
In college, I took part in a primal scream during exams but it didn’t make me feel half as good as my ridiculous growl.
What would you prefer a primal scream, growl, hum or something else? What’s one silly way you love to clear out tension and uncover creative fun?
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04.28.08
Posted in Exercises, Musings at 3:51 am by Natasha Reilly
One Film Gets My Daughter’s Toes’ Wiggling
If the movie, Music and Lyrics, had not been made I fear my daughter may never have eaten. The moment the film begins, the world is filled with sunshine, the smell of roses permeates the air and she happily eats her food. When finished, my daughter gets down from her high chair and dances around. I need to send Hugh Grant, Drew Barrymore and Marc Lawrence, the writer and director, a thank you note.
Her obsession with the film got me to thinking about movies that I love, movies I can watch again and again without getting sick of them. There are films I watch to simply relax and others to re-ignite the fires of my imagination when I’m devoid of creativity. Here are some that make me laugh, others that make me want to move my feet, some that make me cry and finally, those that inspire me.
The Breakfast Club – but truthfully have you ever heard of the term “neo-maxi-zoomed-dweebie” used in any other film?
Sixteen Candles – the interaction between Long Duk Dong (Gedde Watanabe) and Jake (Michael Schoeffling) when Jake is looking for Samantha (Molly Ringwald) STILL makes me laugh when I watch it. And honestly, is there anything better than Jake suddenly appearing at the church and waving to Samantha?
50 First Dates – Hawaii, a penguin in a Hawaiian shirt, an adorable concept – making someone fall in love with you everyday – and 311’s song, Amber, make for a fun viewing experience.
Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels – there are at least three different storylines going on at the same time and when they all collide it’s fantastic.
The Usual Suspects – he got me. Writer Christopher McQuarrie (he apparently wrote this at his parent’s kitchen table) completely got me with the ending. I still wonder about the difference between truth and fiction when I watch it. And Keyser Soze – what a name!
Jaws – I have some sort of serious obsession with this film. Oddly, I love everything about it, especially when Police Chief Brody (Roy Scheider), Quint (Robert Shaw) and Matt Hooper (Richard Dreyfuss) are sitting on the boat singing.
The Lost Boys – the music and the boys – Jason Patrick and Keifer Sutherland – they made this movie for me.
Before Sunrise & Before Sunset – the conversations between Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy are thought-provoking.
Four Weddings and a Funeral – the characters in this film were a riot. Although I hate Andie McDowell’s line, “Is it raining? I hadn’t noticed” at the end of the film, I like the idea of focusing the film around life’s big moments.
About a Boy – There is a warmth about this film. I like the idea of lonely folks – some who know and acknowledge that their lonely and some who deny it – finding one another and creating a makeshift family.
The Goonies – They’re the Goonies, they’re hilarious. I SO wish I had a friend with tons of gadgets. I would have enjoyed their adventure.
Say Anything – I wanted to date Lloyd (John Cusack)…period, end of story. If he’d held up a radio and played a song outside of my window there is no way I would have turned my back and gone to sleep.
Some Kind of Wonderful – Watts (Mary Stuart Masterson) was amazing…she was just well, kinda wonderful. And I adored the bald-headed guy that Keith (Eric Stoltz) met in detention.
Gross Pointe Blank – the idea of a hitman needing therapy (aside from Tony Soprano) was hilarious.
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off – I still want to sing, dance and get a crowd going on a parade float someday!
As Good As It Gets – I ended up wanting that weird looking dog!
What are some of yours?
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04.25.08
Posted in Creative Stumbling Blocks, Exercises, Musings at 3:52 am by Natasha Reilly
Photo by Danielle
The other day my daughter sat on the floor looking defeated. She was mourning the loss of her pretzel which had been pulverized, its fragments driven deep into our carpet by either her father or I as we rushed around trying to do four things at once, our normal routine these days. I understood her pain. I knew she felt as though she were sitting in the middle of a disaster area.
That same day, I dressed in a pair of pants that finally fit, as Goldie Locks would say, “just right”, threw on a T-shirt and a pair of cute sandals and headed out. I was feeling good and then my husband pointed out the dried boogers on my shoulder, a gift bestowed by my congested daughter when I lifted her into her stroller.
The day before I blew the circuits in my apartment when an extension cord disintegrated in my hands – the shock was minimal thank Heaven - and the day after I showed up to a work event with dried pretzel on my skirt.
Sometimes I feel like no matter what I do, I am a giant walking disaster dropping things, spilling things, feeling far from put together. These are the times when I believe I should have a sign around my neck, like the ones you see on the highway that warn of falling rocks, and caution tape all around the perimeter of my body. I have to ask, does this ever happen to you??
I sent an email to a several friends asking this question and three, hilarious mothers were the first to reply. Patricia, a mother of two, adorable children, shared the litany of questions she asks herself after getting her and her children out the door in the morning which included, “Am I fully dressed?” Annie, a mother of four, beautiful, young children, responded that she was feeling that way right at that moment and then ran off to juggle her children, a fundraiser and life. Faith, a mother of one, handsome son, said that “becoming a mom is a slow ongoing process of letting go.” I agree with this line of thinking but don’t think this idea of release applies solely to motherhood. I would say that every creative endeavor we undertake, anything we pour our heart, body and mind into, requires a level of letting go. Things change, ideas change and mature as do children thus we cannot hold on too tightly to anything. We must be ready to let things, moments, rules go so that new ideas can settle in their place and challenge us to grow.
In my case, I think it’s a letting go of my sanity …wait that might already be gone. Seriously, it’s a letting go of my need to control how every little thing is going to turn out. It’s letting go of that evil thing I have written about but still struggle with – perfection. In doing so, I am again beginning to embrace my “disaster area” status. Hell, I’m even starting to enjoy it. I think that new perspectives, openness and true beauty (the wonderful kind that far outweighs the importance of outward appearances) are born from chaos. Every single day, I am reminded that there is a freedom and lots of laughter in being imperfect. Now, if I could only remember that….
As for my daughter and her pretzel, she is just learning about the disaster area thing but I have a feeling she’s going to enjoy it.
Have you ever felt like a walking disaster? I need more members to join this growing club. It makes me feel more human.
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04.23.08
Posted in Artist Interviews at 3:25 am by Natasha Reilly
Bridget Murphy’s First Race
Bridget Murphy is one of those people you want to have in your life. From her ability to make others feel comfortable in any situation to her knack for making people laugh when they least expect it, she is a true inspiration. Bridget is driven to succeed but her drive does not blind her to the needs of others. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. The closer she moves toward accomplishing her dreams, the more she strives to help others to follow their passion. As Bridget prepares to run the NYC Half-Marathon, she is not just focusing on training, she’s working to help kids improve their health and their lives.
CN: Congratulations on being accepted into the NYC Half-Marathon! When did you decide that you wanted to run it?
Bridget: I’ve always wanted to run a marathon – specifically the NYC marathon. I saw that the NYRR (New York Road Runners) posted the application for the Half-Marathon so I applied through NYRR and eventually through the charity, Team for Kids.
CN: The Half-Marathon will bring you one step closer to the NYC Marathon. How long have you dreamt of running the NYC Marathon?
Bridget: As long as I can remember I’ve always wanted to run the NYC Marathon. I can remember walking to First Avenue with my family and cheering all the runners on. I always thought it was such an amazing accomplishment and wonderful experience to run through all five boroughs and have millions of people cheering for you. I’m not an athlete by any stretch of the imagination but it amazes me how every year hundreds of ordinary people run the marathon.
CN: Has running been a childhood dream?
Bridget: Not running but the marathon, yes, has always been a dream. I would also like to train for triathlons.
CN: What is your first memory of running?
Bridget: Hmm…probably a first memory of running was just with my brother running crazy through the park or in the fields in Ireland.
CN: What benefits does running give you – mentally, physically, and emotionally?
Bridget: So far my longest run was the Colon Cancer Challenge last year that was a little over 9 miles – mentally I would say it prepares you for challenges in life – everyday life. I say to myself – well if I can run such and such a distance this challenge at work shouldn’t be too bad (I just have to keep reminding myself of that!). I’ve always admired a woman that has a strong athletic body – not the slinky kind we normally see. But I’ve only recently strived to achieve that strong body not just a sexy bod (ha!). It’s incredibly challenging. Emotionally, it’s true after exercise the endorphins are released and I do feel energized. While I’m running I listen to my music and all kinds of thoughts flow through my head! I can think of the bills I need to pay or a song may come on that reminds me of my grandma. Running gives me the freedom to just think clearly.
CN: So, you use music when you are working out/training, what’s the one song that really keeps you motivated and excited to push yourself?
Bridget: I always use music! It’s the one time that I always listen to music. Rocky – seriously rocky pushes me. The trumpets and the visual I have in my head of him boxing Drago (Rocky IV) and running up the steps really pumps me (even if that is corny!).
CN: You will be running for Team for Kids…tell us a little about it? How can people help?
Bridget: Team for Kids is a great organization that supports youth running programs. These programs help children fight obesity, become more active, learn the importance of nutrition and support their self-esteem by setting goals. People can donate to Team for Kids by visiting their website, and clicking donate. If they are interested in donating under my name, my last name is Murphy registration number: 262140.
CN: How do you keep yourself motivated to run? Train?
Bridget: Well it can be extremely challenging to stay motivated. After a long day at work or school I can be drained. But I have to focus on my goals – whether that’s running a Half-Marathon or running one more mile than the previous day. For my training I am going to have to become diligent about my weekly schedule. I know I’m a procrastinator but when I have to finish 13 miles in 3 hours I’m going to have to stick to it. In between now and July the NYRR hosts other races and I plan to participate in those to keep my motivation alive.
CN: That’s right! You’re currently working a full-time job and going to school for your graduate degree. That’s intense! How will you juggle everything with training?
Bridget: It will be a great lesson in learning how to balance life’s complications! I know it’s going to be extremely hard but I’m not just running for me I’m running for a charity and I have lots of friends and family behind me.
CN: What is the most creative part of running? Putting together the training schedule?
Bridget: Well I’m really creative in thinking of reasons why I don’t need to run on a particular day - so the challenging part is remembering why I’m running. On days when it just seems tedious I may chose a different path or mix up my music. Eventually on the weekends I would like to run along the Hudson River.
CN: How will you put the schedule together for running the NYC Half-Marathon?
Bridget: Every week is different whether it’s because of work, school or friends. I will have to see what each week brings and make sure I’m getting in the amount of miles I need and within a good time. Team for Kids also organizes group runs which I plan to join.
CN: If you had a bumper sticker on you that everyone would see as you ran by what would it read?
Bridget: American Gladiator in Training!
CN: For all the people reading this who may dream of running the NYC Half-Marathon and NYC Marathon who are balancing work and/or family, what advice would you give them?
Bridget: I’m still learning that things you really want you have to really work for – and accomplishments don’t happen overnight or in a week. It’s incredibly easy to get side-tracked but it’s important to remember not to let those “interruptions” distract you. Just put your nose to the grindstone and work at it – but enjoy the small accomplishments along the way.
Again, if you’d like to support Bridget Murphy and Team for Kids, visit the Team for Kids website or simply click on the words, Team for Kids, here. On the Team for Kids website, select “Donate” and click on the link to donate to a Team for Kids member running the Half-Marathon and enter Bridget Murphy’s name and registration number: 262140.
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